Bob and Jane are in their fifties. They’ve been married for over twenty-five years and have college-age children. Lately Jane has begun to wonder if something is going on in Bob’s life. He’s been more … [Read More...]
3 ways pastors can help women and families experiencing postpartum depression
As a pastor of a congregation with young families you may have small groups, a MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers) ministry, Awana, and more. Your church may also be blessed to have a meals ministry to help individuals and families after a … [Read More...]
Pastoral care and refuge for rape victims
In this article we follow Tory Flynn’s heart-wrenching story of being raped and the unexpected aftermath that God orchestrated in her life. As we hear from Tory (indented text), we also receive expert commentary from Dr. Diane Langberg, a … [Read More...]
How your pastoral limitations can bless your churches
When most of us first start out in ministry vocationally, it’s because we love the Lord. Jesus is lovely to us, and His grace is marvelous to us. We can’t imagine anything greater than coming home to God. But oftentimes, as we go through … [Read More...]
How one church offered hope to a same-sex struggler
Melissa Fisher grew up in a churchgoing home, but her childhood included family turmoil, her parents’ divorce, and sexual violations that she kept secret. While attending a Christian college, she faced her same-sex attraction (SSA) and … [Read More...]
How to restore broken marriages after an affair, part 2
In part 1 of this case study, Dr. Les Carter outlined how to counsel “Bob and Jane” through the discovery process after Bob’s infidelity was revealed and what signs indicate a couple is ready to begin a restoration process. In this article, … [Read More...]
5 critical missteps in helping self-harmers
When we think about the issue of self-harm, most of us take a step back in confusion. Why would anyone willingly want to inflict pain on themselves? Isn’t that dangerous? What would I do if I encountered someone with that struggle? A … [Read More...]
Despite the distance: Helping grandparents and grandchildren stay connected
Grandparents want to impact their families, particularly their grandchildren. They want to be a positive influence in their families’ lives, but sometimes grandparents need … [Read More...]
Magnetic mediocrity: Why women settle for the wrong guy, and what to do about it
When we counsel a couple separating or working through the wreckage of divorce, it’s not unusual for a pastor to think, “If only this could have been dealt with sooner—before it … [Read More...]
Gently: Biblical guidance and strategies for aiding those who have been sexually abused
Women in your congregation who have been abused, assaulted, molested, or raped carry a tremendous burden. Without biblical help, these dear women are left to struggle with shame, … [Read More...]
Resolving conflict before it starts: Why your relational skills are more vital than you thought
In my thirty years of doing conflict resolution with Peacemaker Ministries, I saw God bring about marvelous reconciliations I never would have dreamed possible. But not all … [Read More...]
Early detection: Developing self-aware volunteers and preventing ministry problems
Nobody starts out in a sport, discipline, or relationship saying, “Wow, I hope this doesn’t go well!” Or, “I hope I’m difficult to work with!” It’s not our intention in the … [Read More...]
Divorce-proof: Helping young couples win at marriage
Young married couples in your church are more likely to get divorced than any other age group. The most recent research by the Pew Research Center shows the divorce rate between … [Read More...]
Hope does: Transforming local schools in ways no one else can
We interviewed Mike Tenbusch, author of The Jonathan Effect: Helping Kids and Schools Win the Battle Against Poverty. He shares from his experiences how churches can partner with … [Read More...]
Strong and sage: Influencing grandparents toward intentionality
God calls grandparents to nurture the spiritual lives of their children and grandchildren, but it’s not always easy. Here are three common hurdles to faithful grandparenting and … [Read More...]
Caring enough to take a stand: Why justice is a form of care ministry
We interviewed Pastor Ken Wytsma, author of The Myth of Equality about why pastors should view seeking justice for the oppressed as a form of care ministry. In light of recent … [Read More...]
The tinder box: Warning signs and safeguards in church conflict
In 1982, Ken Sande established Peacemaker Ministries, an organization dedicated to biblical conflict resolution for individuals, families, churches, and institutions. The training … [Read More...]
All together now: Coaching parents to connect with kids
Perhaps you could put yourself in Maria’s shoes as she shrivels with embarrassment during this incident at a Target checkout line with her four-year-old daughter, Amy: “Amy, put … [Read More...]
What not to do: 4 pitfalls to avoid in ministry to singles
In my recent book, Redeeming Singleness, I present a theology of singleness from the beginning of creation, through the history of Israel in the Old Testament, to Jesus and Paul in … [Read More...]
The roller coaster they never wanted: Helping people trust God when their lives are upside down
If you are a pastor, then I’m sure every once in a while you have a conversation with a Job. You sit down with someone, hear his story, and find it hard to imagine that anything … [Read More...]
That’s my girl: Equipping fathers for powerful connections with daughters
The Bible tells us that fathers play a fundamental and foundational role in their families. Yet more often than not, dads typically fail to realize the powerful impact they have on … [Read More...]
For the next generation: Engaging grandparents for powerful impact
When you look at the grandparents in your church, what do you see? My guess is that you see some pursuing travel and leisure with vigor, others heavily involved in child care for … [Read More...]
How discipleship ministries enhance counseling outcomes
Jenna, a twenty-seven-year-old working professional, comes to see you initially for anxiety related to work. She shares with you that she’s been really stressed working sixty-plus … [Read More...]
Broken: The impact of divorce on children—and 4 ways to ease their pain
Most of us have witnessed a divorce within our congregations; many of us have seen it up close and personal in our own families. It doesn’t matter how big or small the church is, … [Read More...]
5 mistakes pastors make in “helping” grieving people
Even though people begin to look and act normal after the death of a loved one, grief is their constant companion for a long, long time. And if you are not talking with them about … [Read More...]
“Our kid’s an atheist. Now what, Pastor?”
Longtime church members Scott and Alyssa make a beeline for you in the church parking lot after services. Alyssa’s eyes are red, and Scott’s movements seem almost frantic. Without … [Read More...]
Counseling someone considering suicide: Know the myths, risks, and responses
When he comes into your office, his hopelessness is clear. Jon doesn’t see a future for his life. The car accident, the pile of medical bills, and his marriage falling apart weigh … [Read More...]
The emotionally intelligent pastor, part 4: Managing your emotions
I was sitting at home on a Saturday talking with my parents, who were visiting from out of state. The phone rang, and I was shocked to hear the reason for the call. On the other … [Read More...]
“Complicated grief” and how a church can help
What is “complicated grief”? For a grieving person, grief is the 24/7 awareness of the tragedy that’s befallen him or her. It’s the thought that keeps running through that … [Read More...]
10 ways to pastor adoptive parents and those considering adoption
There are many ways that you can express your pastoral care for those considering adoption and those who have adopted already. As an adoptive father and former pastor, I offer a … [Read More...]
The pastor and emotional intelligence, part 3: The surprising way your emotions affect your thinking
Consider the following scenarios. How are they similar to one another? How are they different from one another? Scenario #1: Cain Murders Abel (Gen. 4:3–9) Scenario #2: … [Read More...]
Helping people rediscover joy in trials
How do you help believers overwhelmed by a whirlwind of trials benefit from what the New Testament writers have to say about joy? First, keep in mind the nature of biblical … [Read More...]
2 ways pastors undermine volunteer recruiting
Any pastor knows that in order to accomplish ministry work within the church, volunteers are needed. However, how often do you find yourself either searching for those volunteers … [Read More...]
The emotionally intelligent pastor, part 2: A biblical perspective on emotions
Suppose Tara, age thirty, shares the following story with you: She experienced a breakup with her boyfriend, Derek, about two months ago. She was crushed, because she thought they … [Read More...]
The emotionally intelligent pastor, part 1: How emotionally intelligent are you?
Brent is a twentysomething seminary student who comes for counseling because of a growing concern expressed by his wife, Monica. She thinks he comes across at times as cold or … [Read More...]
3 ways to prepare parents for empty nesting
When we think of the empty nest, we picture a variety of colorful visuals. They may be of the optimistic type, where the parents are now free to invest more time and energy into … [Read More...]
Spotting domestic abuse
John and Carol were in counseling for over a year. Their presenting problem was identified as communication issues and difficulties agreeing on how to discipline their teenage son. … [Read More...]
Are you discouraged by the fruit of your counseling?
I have served as a counselor now for fifteen years. I would like to say that during those years I have perfected my craft to the point that I witness stunning results with every … [Read More...]
Mastering the art of silence
Counsel in a man’s heart is deep water; but a man of understanding draws it out.” (Prov. 20:5 HCSB) One of the hardest tools I learned in my graduate studies was the art of … [Read More...]
How to help millennials choose a career
Most millennials have no idea what they want to major in, let alone what career they would like to pursue. One study estimates that as many as 50 percent of students entering … [Read More...]
Inspiring and involving grandparents who lack purpose
If there’s one thing we expect grandparents in our churches to do, it’s spoil their grandkids. This is so ingrained in our mind-set that we speak of grandparents having the … [Read More...]
Excerpts from Brad Hambrick’s In This Together interview (plus behind the scenes photos)
We recently recorded another In This Together interview. (In This Together is a new video series our team is working on. In This Together will equip laypeople to share the pastoral … [Read More...]
Helping parents with rebellious children
Several years ago I got invited to speak at ACBC, the Association of Certified Biblical Counselors, about rebellious teenagers. Little did I know I was about to embark on a season … [Read More...]
Giving uncommon, yet biblical, parenting advice
How many times have you talked to exasperated parents like this mother? “I’m exhausted. Life with my five-year-old has been so hard lately. No matter what I do, he seems to … [Read More...]
I don’t want Mommy to date anybody!
Imagine this: Sunday morning after the service, a church member, Amber, approaches you for some advice. She’s been a single mom of two young children since her divorce a few years … [Read More...]
Top 3 articles of June (and more)!
1. Confident preaching on controversial topics: 10 ways to prepare If your subject is controversial and your heart is in your throat, it’s going to be hard to get your message … [Read More...]
Observing Refugee Sunday when your church is divided
Dr. Jamie D. Aten discusses three ways Scripture and scientific studies of humility can help your congregation navigate the refugee crisis. Many congregations stand divided on … [Read More...]
10 indicators of successful, domestic-abuse counseling
In this reprinted article, counselor Leslie Vernick responds to a tricky question about “progress” after domestic abuse has been confronted. We trust you will benefit from her … [Read More...]
3 important environments for marriage preparation
The expense of a wedding might be great ... One of the most consistent themes that emerges in counseling young couples, especially in the critical first five years, is the … [Read More...]
What to say to church members with financial problems
As a long-time pastor, I’ve counseled church members on all kinds of life issues. And now, as a speaker and expert on biblical finance with Dave Ramsey’s organization, I’ve grown … [Read More...]
Confident preaching on controversial topics: 10 ways to prepare
If your subject is controversial and your heart is in your throat, it’s going to be hard to get your message out. Here are ten ways to prepare your sermon that can really help. … [Read More...]
Post-sermon, care ministry: How our church does it
An interview with Tom Haren Tom Haren oversees the care ministry at NewSpring Church at its Anderson, SC, campus. He shared with us how NewSpring uses trained volunteers to … [Read More...]
Why should you ask church members questions about pop culture?
When you sit down with someone in your church, perhaps someone who is struggling with marital strife due to alcohol abuse or anxiety after a job loss or a prolonged depression, how … [Read More...]
How care teams can deepen your church’s ministry to needy people
Pastoral crises come to every church. In his 30 years as lead pastor at New Life Presbyterian Church of Dresher, PA, Ron Lutz saw how care teams can provide a deeper level of … [Read More...]
A day in the park with Nancy Guthrie
A few weeks ago, our senior content developer, Jeff Forrey, and our video director, Matt Bowman, went to Nashville, TN, to interview Nancy Guthrie. Nancy’s a friend of the … [Read More...]
7 ways to use CareLeader.org in your ministry
We’ve been producing CareLeader.org for just over a year now. During that time a number of you have let me know how you’re using CareLeader.org to equip your own care leaders. I’ve … [Read More...]
When does humor signal marital problems?
Have you ever noticed how some things correlate? The amount of air pressure in your tires affects the smoothness of your ride and the gas mileage of your vehicle. The amount of … [Read More...]
What constitutes a pastoral approach?
What does it mean to be “pastoral”? I’m a pastor. Have been for almost fifteen years. I love my job. I get to serve the God I love and work with the things our God loves most … [Read More...]
Top 3 articles of May
Here’s a look at the top three CareLeader articles of May 2017! 1. When a person feels trapped but may not want to change, what do you do? Some people just don't want to … [Read More...]
Why we almost canceled Tim’s In This Together interview
The wisest thing to do is to cancel the trip.” That’s what Steve, my boss, told me the day before we were set to send our senior writer and our video director to California to … [Read More...]
The Freedom of Responsibility teaching and counseling packet
So that’s when Susie said, “Sometimes people don’t realize that their circumstances could be different—and how they’re contributing to their own mess.” Let me back up a bit. … [Read More...]
How to avoid preaching insensitive sermons
Lane Sebring has spent a lot of time preaching, and thinking and writing about how to do it well. He is associate pastor at Centreville Baptist Church in the Northern … [Read More...]
How to free up more time to care for your congregation
A few weeks ago, we had the opportunity to talk with Dr. Jim Petty, a former pastor and counselor, about the difficulties pastors often face in time management. What he had to say … [Read More...]
Meet In This Together expert Dr. Lee Spitzer
Last Monday, we captured our second In This Together interview. Dr. Lee Spitzer, author of Making Friends, Making Disciples, joined us to explain the positive and often-overlooked … [Read More...]
Speak wisely: Gender communication preferences
From the very beginning, men and women have been different.1 God designed Eve to match Adam in most respects, but also to be different from him in others. Though differences … [Read More...]
Common errors made in attempts at conflict resolution
You know it’s going to happen. You can’t be a shepherd and avoid mediating in conflicts. That much is certain. However, your responses to conflicts are affected by a variety of … [Read More...]
When a person feels trapped but may not want to change, what do you do?
Andy Farmer’s pastoral ministry includes a lot of counseling, so he’s often had someone tell him, “Pastor, I’m trapped in this and I need help.” It led him to write a book about … [Read More...]
In This Together: Dr. Lee Spitzer
On Monday, we captured our second In This Together interview. Dr. Lee Spitzer, author of Making Friends, Making Disciples, joined us to explain the positive and often-overlooked … [Read More...]
Caring for aging parents: 6 ways to prepare your people well
With such a large group of Baby Boomers getting older, there is also a larger number of middle-aged adults caring for aging parents. Many times, this is entered into with little … [Read More...]
Why is it hard to get people to open up?
Why is it so hard to get people to open up? I asked Pastor Andy Farmer of Covenant Fellowship Church in Glen Mills, PA, to answer that question. He said the reasons why people are … [Read More...]
Footage from the first In This Together interview
We’re serious about producing In This Together! Want proof? Last week we captured our first In This Together interview. The interviewee? Pastor Jonathan Holmes, a counseling … [Read More...]
Keeping gossip out of prayer requests
Naturally, part of caring for others is praying for them. But sometimes in sharing prayer requests, we can hurt the very people we want to bless. Matt Mitchell offers a helpful … [Read More...]
Are you giving people what they really need to win the war waged against their souls?
What tends to consume your thinking when you start counseling people? Are you aware that when you sit with others to discuss the issues of their hearts, you actually enter a war … [Read More...]
Post-abortion counseling
It is estimated that 43 percent of women under the age of forty-five have had an abortion. One in six women in the evangelical Christian church is post-abortive.1 We live in a … [Read More...]
When hurting people reveal unhelpful assumptions, what should you say?
"God doesn’t care about me.” “There’s no hope.” “If she would just stop nagging me, I’d be happy.” As pastors, we regularly hear those kinds of statements from people. And … [Read More...]
Blended families: 4 considerations for pastors
Sunday morning after service, you’re chatting with a set of parents in your congregation. In passing, they mention that their oldest daughter, fourteen-year-old Anna, has gotten … [Read More...]
Don’t take grief (or any other significant experience) on as an identity
About five years ago, our team began working on the third edition of the GriefShare program. To put that program together I interviewed a number of people who’d lost loved ones. … [Read More...]
Helping the depressed
In this packet you will find several teaching and counseling tools. We encourage you to use this free resource to care for those struggling with depression and to teach others … [Read More...]
When someone resists your advice
Brad Hambrick is a pastoral counselor in Raleigh, NC. We asked him to respond to a question that pastors inevitably face: “If someone you counsel in your church refuses or ignores … [Read More...]
Receiving God’s grace in your grief
An Interview with Elizabeth W. D. Groves On February 5, 2007, J. Alan Groves, professor of Old Testament at Westminster Theological Seminary, lost a battle with melanoma. His … [Read More...]
Helping stepfamilies when things go wrong
In a previous article, we introduced licensed marriage and family therapist Ron Deal, director of FamilyLife Blended™, a resource website for blended families and the churches who … [Read More...]
Why do people cut themselves? And how to help them stop
Self-harm behaviors can be a foreign concept to many of us adults, but they are on the rise among adolescents and young adults. The National Institutes of Health indicate rates … [Read More...]
Single parents: Is your church meeting their unique needs?
Download the book today! And if you need even more help creating a viable ministry to the single parents in your community, consider Single & Parenting, a video-based curriculum … [Read More...]
Building relationships with families touched by chronic illness and disability
The numbers have grown too big to ignore. More than 65 million people, 29 percent of the US population, provide care for a chronically ill, disabled, or aged family member—a child … [Read More...]
5 mistakes to avoid when counseling the sexually abused
When individuals tell you, Pastor, that they were sexually abused or raped, often those victims are terrified, full of shame, and sure that you are going to think less of them. … [Read More...]
How we provide (sustainable) holistic care
What is holistic care ministry, and why is it important? Wendy Herrberg, care ministry director at Indian Creek Christian Church, “The Creek,” in Indianapolis, IN (who formerly … [Read More...]
Caring for someone released from prison
It’s been five years since Miea Walker was released from prison, where she served a nine-year sentence for a money crime. She knows firsthand the needs of prisoners inside the … [Read More...]
Friend-based ministry
As you know, we’re working on a new curriculum that equips people to use their friendships as a platform for ministry. Last week, we brought a few experts to our offices to discuss … [Read More...]
The lay counseling conundrum
This week Jeff Forrey and I sat down with a counselor and two communication specialists. And don’t worry. It wasn’t because our work relationship is deteriorating. We actually … [Read More...]
5 ways to help counselees find friendships
Too often, when self-sacrificial love is required to form friendships, we isolate and hunker down in our own foxholes of safety and security. Over the years, I’ve noticed that a … [Read More...]
Caring for your church after the dismissal of a pastor (and for yourself)
An interview with Rev. Tim Sharpe When a senior pastor suddenly must resign, the effects on the congregation are going to range from bewilderment to anger. The remaining … [Read More...]
7 gospel-centered principles for protecting a marriage
Almost every marriage begins with joy as newlyweds anticipate sharing life together. Sadly, not all couples live happily ever after. A large percentage of marriages end in divorce. … [Read More...]
5 ways to address seniors’ end-of-life concerns
Share this post with your deacons or small-group leaders to help them better minister to senior Christians in their small groups who have concerns or fears about heaven and the … [Read More...]
Counseling domineering husbands
In my practice as a Christian counselor, I counsel a lot of men who have hurt their wives—emotionally, verbally, or even physically. Every counselor who has worked with a couple in … [Read More...]
20 ways to get people involved in care ministry
By equipping your members to counsel one another, you enable them to do the frontline work of ministry. Here are twenty ways to cultivate a culture of counseling and discipleship … [Read More...]
How we organize congregational care
We aren’t a model church by any means, but one of the things we’ve worked on a lot over the past five years is how we do congregational care and oversight. Even though we have a … [Read More...]
Top 3 posts of January
Here’s a look at the top three CareLeader posts of January 2017! 1. 5 myths about forgiveness Undoubtedly in your ministry, you’ve encountered people who hold on to grudges … [Read More...]
Helping people who feel like impostors
Recently we interviewed Jon Noto, community life pastor at Willow Creek North Shore in the Chicago, IL, area. We took the opportunity to ask him about “impostor syndrome.” … [Read More...]
Helping a perfectionist paralyzed with a fear of failure
I will never measure up.” “I can’t do this. I won’t be successful!” “I sense impending doom; it’s out there, and it’s coming to get me.” You might think this sounds … [Read More...]
When teens struggle with their faith
We asked pastoral counselor Brad Hambrick this question: “What counsel would you give to the parents of a teenage daughter who announces, ‘I don’t think I want to be a Christian … [Read More...]
Ministering to the reluctant and the resistant
While many people think the main part of the pastor’s job is simply to preach, the Scriptures tell us that the pastor is also called to shepherd people through the suffering of … [Read More...]
Changing ideas about the cause of depression
A good deal of recent research has been published that is really interesting to anyone involved in medicine and Christian counseling. Some of it takes commonly held ideas about the … [Read More...]
When a child says, “I don’t know”
The book of Proverbs reminds us that we are to disciple our children (Prov. 1:8). But to do that—to be good disciplers—we need relationships with our kids that are honest and open. … [Read More...]
Preaching or counseling?
In pastoral ministry, are preaching and counseling complementary ways of proclaiming Christ? Is one more important than the other? Or is one essential and the other less so? … [Read More...]
5 myths about forgiveness
Undoubtedly in your ministry, you’ve encountered people who hold on to grudges tightly or who are embroiled in conflict. In these cases, forgiveness must be a key focus of your … [Read More...]
Body or soul?
Psychotropic medications are a sensitive topic; most people you talk to will have fairly strong opinions about whether or not they should be used in treating a host of life’s … [Read More...]
3 essential elements in the change process
You might not know “Brock,” but his struggles with extravagant spending and gambling can illustrate three essential elements for change in a Christian’s life. What Brock needs … [Read More...]
5 ways to help hurting, lonely people through the holidays
Is it New Year’s yet? I just want this year to be over.” While many of us have been rushing around the past few weeks getting ready to celebrate the birth of our Savior, others … [Read More...]
Helping perfectionists receive criticism
Dr. Amy Baker, author of the book Picture Perfect, talked with us recently about how perfectionists struggle when criticized, whether justly or unjustly. Her answers give pastors … [Read More...]
Porn: Women struggle with it, too
Pornography addiction is typically classified as a man’s problem. But we recently interviewed Rachel Coyle, a certified counselor with the Association of Certified Biblical … [Read More...]
Help grieving people survive the holidays with hope
Most people look forward to the holidays and the attendant family celebrations and traditions. But during the holidays, those who have lost loved ones will be even more potently … [Read More...]
Encouraging people to open up after trauma
The word trauma means “wound,” so a trauma is a wound to the mind, the heart, and the soul. Sometimes it’s a wound to the body as well. But it is a wound to the whole person, and … [Read More...]
How to care for church members shaken by a pastoral scandal
We recently interviewed Phil Sasser, pastor and elder at Sovereign Grace Church in Apex, NC. Phil shared with us his views on church polity, specifically the need for establishing … [Read More...]
Helping victims of domestic abuse
To understand domestic abuse properly, let’s start with the word abuse, which comes from the Latin word abutor, meaning “to use wrongly.” It also means “to insult, violate, … [Read More...]
Helping those who are angry with God
Let’s begin with a case study. Todd, a middle-aged divorced man, says he is angry with God because, essentially, his life is falling apart. His wife left him for another man; his … [Read More...]
Understanding the unique needs of stepfamilies
We interviewed licensed marriage and family therapist Ron Deal, director of FamilyLife Blended™ (a division of FamilyLife®), about the unique needs of stepfamilies, which are often … [Read More...]
Helping PTSD sufferers
Consider the following scenarios that someone in your congregation might face: James narrowly survives a terrorist attack. Janette witnesses a rape or murder. Melody is told that … [Read More...]
Ministry to military personnel
Interviews with chaplains Major Jonette Englehardt and Colonel Ken Lawson How might you minister to the men and women in the US military? Those who serve our country in the … [Read More...]
Helping people become aware of their desires, part 1
Jen Pollock Michel is the author of Teach Us to Want, named Christianity Today’s 2015 Book of the Year. We interviewed Jen to get her ideas on desire and contentment, which was the … [Read More...]
Helping people become aware of their desires, part 2
Earlier this week, we shared the first part of an interview with Jen Pollock Michel, author of Teach Us to Want: Longing, Ambition, and the Life of Faith. There she talked a bit … [Read More...]
When a couple wants change—fast!
Jack and Emma are making a last-ditch effort to fix their marriage. Jack sits across the room from you, arms folded tightly across his chest, his jaw clenched. Emma can’t keep … [Read More...]
I burned out at Saddleback Church
Lance Witt, who served twenty years as a senior pastor and six years as an executive/teaching pastor at Saddleback Church, shares insights on how pastors can prevent burnout and … [Read More...]
“Pastor, my husband’s addicted to pornography!”
A recent study shared that 47 percent of Christian men struggle with pornography, many of whom have a full-blown addiction to it. That’s almost half of the men in each … [Read More...]
Teach others to encourage skillfully
If you’ve been involved in ministry for any length of time, then Paul’s concern for the Thessalonian church and for Timothy will resonate with you: But since we belong to the … [Read More...]
Sometimes you have to cancel service
Editor’s note: The recent resignation of Pastor Pete Wilson, founding pastor of Cross Point Church in Nashville, TN, has sparked conversations about what should be expected of … [Read More...]
Caring for the fatherless
Growing up without a father There’s the seven-year-old boy who spent a couple of weeks with his father, who wants to be a player in Las Vegas. The boy comes back totally … [Read More...]
How I care for everyone—when I can’t be everywhere
The Lord has called me to plant churches, starting with the Bridge Church in Brooklyn, NY, in April of 2014. Part of the mission of Bridge Church is to plant churches all over New … [Read More...]
The initial marriage counseling session
Where do I start? Ministry requires never-ending learning and growing. I am constantly reminded about something I need to do and develop. Just a few weeks ago, a fellow elder … [Read More...]
Premarital counseling
When I’m talking to a pre-marriage couple, they’re giddy, they’re excited, they’re enthused about what’s coming. And I want to be enthused with them, because it is an exciting … [Read More...]
5 common marriage counseling mistakes
Pastors are all familiar with that couple. The couple that asks for help and says something has to change, and now! But why the sudden urgency? Maybe something has come out: … [Read More...]
12 ways to prevent child sexual abuse
Jonathan was sick to his stomach. No pastor ever wants a child hurt. Yet, his church was facing a lawsuit over sexual abuse in their children’s ministry. He was bogged down with … [Read More...]
How classroom layout affects kids
Have you ever stopped to look at your children’s area or classrooms from a child’s perspective? Places where children spend meaningful time need to feel safe and comfortable. But … [Read More...]
5 ways to bless a hurting child
There is a hurting child in your world. You may know he’s hurting; you may not. He might be in your neighborhood. He might be in the children’s ministry class you lead. He might … [Read More...]
Counseling the perfectionist
Chances are that you will rarely, if ever, have someone ask for your help in overcoming perfectionism. Yet perfectionism may be very common in those who seek out your help. If … [Read More...]
4 reasons you need a break
The world is not going to end if you take a day off. This planet will keep turning if you go on a vacation. One of the best things you can do to stay fresh as a preacher is to take … [Read More...]
Which one is the child sex offender?
Karen was an innocent teenager in a hallway of a local mega-church heading home after a youth event. Sam, a building manager, pulled her into an empty classroom and forced her to … [Read More...]
Ministering to senior adults
As a pastor, what is your ideal church member? Most of us, if we answer honestly, would say that we want young adults. That’s the way to grow the church, after all. But did you … [Read More...]
Grandparents who parent again
Grandparents who parent their grandchildren come in all ages, shapes, sizes, and colors. Some are healthy. Others aren’t. Some are financially stable. Others live on a fixed … [Read More...]
Caring for caregivers
An interview with Dr. Howard Eyrich How can I possibly cope with caring for my parents? Can we even afford the cost of caring for them?” These are common—and … [Read More...]
How to increase your concern for victims of racism
You may dismiss that racism is very much alive and well, because the narratives of those who are marginalized, who experience it, are often counter to your experience. But when … [Read More...]
How to help people who plan to protest
Soon I’ll be seventy years old. My decades as a Christian activist have taught me valuable lessons about protesting injustice. I’ve had to learn a lot of these things the hard way, … [Read More...]
How to care for victims of racism
An interview with Jerome Gay Jr. and James Roberson Racism is the oppression of a group of people for the preservation of another group of people. Whether systemic or subtle, … [Read More...]
Why pastors should care about racism
Due to the politicizing of race in our media, the Christian community can tend to disregard the existence of racism. Tim Keller describes the indifference that some experience by … [Read More...]
Will your church be able to help when trouble comes?
Disasters are on the rise, and as a result there are a lot of hurting people caught in the aftermath. Imagine for a moment that a disaster came through your community in the … [Read More...]
10 losses of trauma victims
Most of the losses that come with trauma are not tangible. Rarely do the people in your church have scars or missing limbs that would provide evidence to others of the trauma they … [Read More...]
Helping the traumatized
Our God describes a good shepherd when He says, “I will feed My flock and … lead them to rest.… I will seek the lost, bring back the scattered, bind up the broken and strengthen … [Read More...]
“Help, I married the wrong person”
A man or woman comes into your office with a refrain you’ve heard too many times: “Pastor, this marriage isn’t working, and I think it’s best if my spouse and I part ways.” And … [Read More...]
Helping people gain freedom from regret
The pain of regret and the constant nagging of a conscience that knows they’ve sinned and been foolish have the potential of crippling people forever. They know they’ve done … [Read More...]
How to help people avoid regrets
Preventing regret: Alice’s dilemma Robert and Alice met through an online dating service. He lives in Minnesota, and she lives in Alabama. Alice’s husband divorced her seven … [Read More...]
5 things pastors can learn from my anorexia
The summer before my junior year of college, I developed anorexia. In the course of about eight months, I dropped more than thirty pounds, to less than 75 percent of the weight … [Read More...]
How to help people with destructive eating habits
Disordered eating is a significant issue in the church. No matter how many people you have in your congregation, you have people who are struggling in some way with destructive … [Read More...]
4 questions for abusive husbands
When working with husbands who have been abusive, you will find that most all of them have a stubborn blindness to what they are doing that is destructive to their wife. Their … [Read More...]
What do pastors have to offer psychiatric patients?
Dr. Mark Cheltenham is a Christian psychiatrist practicing in Raleigh, NC. In this interview, he shares both the limitations of psychiatric care and the impact that the gospel and … [Read More...]
3 common mistakes of addicts’ families
Families of addicts feel desperate to help their loved ones stop abusing drugs or alcohol. However, if their desperate, though understandable, responses to their loved one’s … [Read More...]
Responding to relapse: a pastor’s questions
Jim had been married to Rachael for eight years when she caught him viewing Internet porn, which he told her had been happening several times a week during the previous two months. … [Read More...]
Responding to relapse: dealing with the shame
Jim was introduced earlier this week in Responding to Relapse: A Pastor’s Questions. His wife of eight years, Rachael, had been shocked to discover he’d been regularly viewing … [Read More...]
4 myths about the wives of porn addicts
The world finds lust, fantasy, masturbation, and pornography not only acceptable, but something to be elevated and encouraged, because they’ve embraced the belief that if anyone is … [Read More...]
5 signs of true repentance in an addict
When I’m counseling and establishing goals for somebody who’s struggling with a drug addiction, or has in the past and is now clean, I really keep it simple. There are just five … [Read More...]
Pastoral responses to addicts’ needs
Dr. Mark Shaw, an ordained minister, certified alcohol and drug abuse counselor, and certified biblical counselor, shared valuable insights with me in a recent interview to help … [Read More...]
The big question of grief: Who am I now?
Where should we put grief? To what category of struggles does it belong? To what emotional or relational struggles is grief most akin? For a long time I put it in the basket of … [Read More...]
3 ways to maintain sanity in ministry
The thrill of God’s victories For those called by the Lord into ministry—whether it’s vocational or volunteer—there are incredible opportunities to see God at work in the lives … [Read More...]
Profile of a workaholic
Workaholics. You’ve got them in your church, and at times, you can relate to them yourself. A workaholic is a compulsive worker: he chooses to work a lot, think about work, and … [Read More...]
“But Pastor, I don’t feel like it”
Many people make unwise choices in response to the way they feel about their circumstances: A person won’t forgive because he is angry. People resist biblical counsel because they … [Read More...]
How to jump-start behavior change
This is going to be a lot of work” is what might pass through your mind when someone with an ingrained, sinful behavior seeks your help to change. How would you like a new, … [Read More...]
3 crucial ways to care for the chronic worrier
Anxiety and worry are challenging enough to work with as a care minister. When it becomes chronic and persists for weeks and months and even years, it can become wearisome. Worry … [Read More...]
Top 3 needs of children of divorce
When children experience the divorce of their parents or the separation of cohabiting parents, they are affected deeply in almost every area of their young lives. To these … [Read More...]
“Pastor, how do I get along with my ex?”
Sadly, many couples are unable to reconcile. In some cases, one partner refuses to consider reconciliation. In other cases, it’s not wise for reconciliation to take place. In other … [Read More...]
The gray divorce crisis: how your church can help
CareLeader.org asked me a series of questions about gray divorce. Gray divorce is a trend that has recently caught the attention of the media and sociologists. During the past two … [Read More...]
The rise of boomer divorces
And here we thought the divorce rate was going down. After all, we’ve read that the number of divorces in recent years has been stabilizing and declining. But it’s important to … [Read More...]
Pastoral counseling is not a game show
Pastoral counseling is not a game show like Wheel of Fortune or Name That Tune, where the object is to buzz in with the right answer having just a minimum of clues. While the … [Read More...]
What wise pastors are thinking while they listen
A church member or counselee sits down with his pastor. He opens his mouth to share his burdens and struggles. So, what thoughts are going through the wise pastor’s head as the … [Read More...]
Helping those living with a narcissist
CareLeader.org asked me a series of questions about narcissistic (extremely self-centered) people and the challenges of living with a narcissist. This information will help you … [Read More...]
When to interrupt someone
Volunteers in pastoral care ministries are generally the most caring people in our churches. While their big hearts help support people well, they bring challenges, … [Read More...]
Confessions of a poor listener
Time is precious; I’m sure you agree. Only so many hours in a day to get everything done—attending a men’s Tuesday morning Bible study, getting ready for Wednesday’s prayer meeting … [Read More...]
Why pastors should encourage couples to be friends
What fuels a strong, resilient, enjoyable marriage? Most people would immediately answer with suggestions like better communication and the ability to resolve conflicts. As … [Read More...]
“Mommy said Daddy is evil”
My introduction to parental alienation was several years ago. A father was constantly telling us all about his ex-wife’s bad traits, and when the child returned from visitation … [Read More...]
Exposing depression’s false gospel
“I’m stuck, and I feel like God’s nowhere to be found.” “I can’t get over how they treated me—like I’m something less than human.” “There’s no hope for me. I’m sorry I’ve … [Read More...]
“Pastor, should I take psychiatric meds?”
Let’s begin this discussion by placing the question in the correct category—whether an individual chooses to use psychiatric medication in his struggle with mental illness is a … [Read More...]
Can your church help the mentally ill?
Mental illness can seem tricky or uncomfortable for a layperson in care ministry. Your lay leaders may feel they aren’t qualified to provide care for people diagnosed with a … [Read More...]
Hospital and nursing home visitation tips
Being a shepherd means being with your sheep through whatever transpires in their lives—birthdays, weddings, job transitions, and the declines evident in old age. When someone in … [Read More...]
Helping couples reestablish trust
Over at my blog, a marriage support group leader asked me, “If a previously unfaithful husband is really working hard to win trust and he appears to be doing the right thing AND … [Read More...]
What caregivers want from pastors
Mary Tutterow, author of The Heart of the Caregiver, shared some of her thoughts with CareLeader.org about the importance of ministering to caregivers and how pastors can … [Read More...]
Caring for those with long-term illnesses
What is truly helpful to a person facing a long-term illness? How can you provide more meaningful care and better meet the person’s needs? As a three-time cancer survivor and … [Read More...]
Counseling: Deciding where to begin
In life and counseling, finding the starting point can be difficult. Life is fluid enough that identifying where to begin with a life-dominating or complex struggle can feel like … [Read More...]
3 reasons depression is complicated
Beware of simplistic explanations You’ll often hear people conclude, “Depression is a sin problem,” or, “It’s a physical illness.” Others will say it’s an “emotional response to … [Read More...]
“Pastor, I can’t forgive myself”
When our Christian counselee or church member says something like, “I just can’t forgive myself,” how do we respond? Perhaps it’s someone who has committed adultery or had an … [Read More...]
3 plausible depression myths
Pastor, I’m depressed … doctor says it’s some sort of major depressive disorder.” We don’t take for granted the amount of trust displayed when someone discloses the diagnosis of … [Read More...]
How pastors can help the depressed
Think about the recent personal conversations you’ve had with troubled people. Do any of them sound like these testimonies from Arlene and Greg?1 Arlene “It was really … [Read More...]
When church members confide abuse
We are living in an age where, due to the Internet, we have access to news that would otherwise be inaccessible. Every day several stories make their way through social media that … [Read More...]
4 pastoral truths for those scared by the news
The Internet has flooded the world with information. Although this has broadened people’s understanding of the world beyond their communities, it has also provided them with wave … [Read More...]
Helping people with panic disorders
If someone tells you she has panic attacks, how do you begin to use Scripture as your guide? (I am choosing panic attacks almost randomly. It is one of a dozen or so psychiatric … [Read More...]
How to help people who struggle with anxiety
Years ago I interviewed Dr. Edward Welch and Dr. Michael Emlet on how to help single parents and people going through divorce to deal with fears and anxiety. Here are just a few of … [Read More...]
“What’s next?” Helping those who fear another tragedy
After a tragedy, a person struggles with a myriad of fears. One such fear is the rationalization that since this terrible event has happened, it very well could happen again. The … [Read More...]
How pastors can help empty nesters with their parenting
Being the parent of a young-adult child has its challenges, particularly in the area of letting the child make his own decisions and mistakes. Empty nesters in your congregation … [Read More...]
Helping people who deny their faults
Jane was at her wit’s end as she listened yet again to her husband scolding their son about his less than desirable work habits. The squabbles between the two males in her life … [Read More...]
“Pastor, does God really care about me?”
You may have heard the adage “People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care.” This saying reminds us that “we are most receptive to counsel from those we … [Read More...]
Why your deacons should be involved in care ministry
No pastoral care model can do without deacons. Their primary calling is not administration and maintenance of a church’s facilities. They, too, are to focus on people. First … [Read More...]
How to help the wife of a spiritually apathetic husband
A spiritually apathetic husband demonstrates little or no interest in his faith and the application of it. Scripture forbids spiritual apathy (Rom. 12:11; Rev. 2:4–5, 3:15–19). … [Read More...]
4 wrong ways to address spiritual apathy
How do you help spiritually apathetic people? This post discusses some of the mistakes pastors make when caring for those who display a lack of emotion or concern about … [Read More...]
Pastoral care for divorced women
I think the church doesn’t know what to do with divorced people because the effects of divorce are so far-reaching.” A dear friend, who married and divorced at a very young age, … [Read More...]
Don’t try to fix people
When you put people into care ministry responsibilities (leading a care ministry group or providing one-on-one support), many of them are apprehensive that they won’t know what to … [Read More...]
A biblical approach to pastoral care
Where do we begin to work ourselves out of the maze of frenetic, chaotic, directionless church life? It begins by letting Scripture shape the way we think about what a leader does. … [Read More...]
A vision for care ministry, discipleship, and counseling
What is your vision for care ministry, discipleship, and counseling? This was the question we had to address at our church some years ago. What follows is our answer to that … [Read More...]
Are your small group leaders making these 6 mistakes?
Batman and Robin, Bo and Luke Duke, Bert and Ernie, pastors and home group leaders … Okay, that analogy fell apart—fast. But the point is that in many churches, pastors and … [Read More...]
How to recruit care ministry leaders
You know the frustration—finding more volunteers, and not just able bodies, but committed lay leaders whose lives demonstrate they are full of wisdom and the Spirit and able to … [Read More...]
10 ways to be certain your pastoral care is helpful
When we care for one another wisely, three things should happen: (a) the person being cared for should be blessed, (b) the love of Christ should become more tangible, and (c) our … [Read More...]
6 lies pastors believe about teens
A parent’s desperation “Please fix my child!” Parents may not articulate their desperation quite this way, but it is often the underlying plea when seeking help for their … [Read More...]
Call the cops? Kick out a rebellious teen? Options when drastic steps are needed
Sometimes an older teen will be so out of control that drastic steps are needed. Should you advise the parents to kick out their child? What other options are there? Dr. Jim … [Read More...]
How to help church members who take in a rebellious teen relative
Many times when a teen is out of control and the parent is not capable of caring for the child, a family member or other person is called in to help. If a state agency is called in … [Read More...]
“Pastor, how do I love my rebellious teen?”
I said I will always love [my daughter] Hannah, but I didn’t always like Hannah,” shares Rhonda. “Anything I asked her to do, she wanted to do the opposite. She was angry at life. … [Read More...]
Should the church do counseling?
In my travels over the past twelve years (and fifteen years of campus and pastoral ministry before that), I have had the privilege of talking with countless pastors. Given my … [Read More...]
8 best practices for your church’s counseling ministry
Should I insist that this counselee attend a local church? How much time should our church invest in a counseling ministry? Should we counsel members of other … [Read More...]
Conflict resolution: When you only have part of the story
As Proverbs 18:17b says, “The first to speak seems right, until someone comes forward and cross-examines.” Or as my friend Daniel likes to say, “There’s no pancake so thin that … [Read More...]
How pastors can help people renew their minds
Pastor Mark found himself becoming frustrated as he talked with Jeremy about what was going on in the young man’s life. Jeremy had recently married Hannah. Jeremy and Hannah dated … [Read More...]
“Pastor, I’m a failure”
My first marriage failed because I was unfaithful to my wife,” shares Michael. “I’m very prone to wanting to go back and beat myself up for that. That was a horrible mistake. I … [Read More...]
Single-parent families: The mission field in Sunday pews
In the early days of my being single again, friends said, “Call me if you need anything.” But I didn’t call anyone for several months. Why? Because I had so many needs … [Read More...]
“Should I try to forget my past?”
As a former pastor and as an equipper of pastors, people often ask me the important question, “Should I try to forget my past?” When hurting people in our congregation and … [Read More...]
Equipping your leaders to give good parenting advice
One opportunity your ministry leaders (elders, deacons, small-group leaders, etc.) probably will have at some time is the opportunity to advise distressed parents. Unfortunately, … [Read More...]
3 surprising reasons kids misbehave
Caleb eats too much, plays roughly with other kids, and in general can’t control himself. Jesse is emotionally delayed and can’t get along with kids his own age. Iris has every toy … [Read More...]
“Pastor, help! My child doesn’t listen to me!”
“We don’t know what else to do with our son. He just doesn’t listen to us.” And that’s your cue to dispense advice that resolves this frazzled couple’s parenting crisis. … [Read More...]
Helping parents avoid 3 understandable parenting mistakes
Picture this scenario: David, an elder in the church, walks into his pastor’s office, lips pressed in a thin line, raking his fingers through his hair. “What’s up?” Pastor … [Read More...]
4 ways to prevent hurting people from giving up on God
God is like an elevator; He lets people down—at least that’s what many people I’ve met would say. In my work for Church Initiative, building curricula to help suffering people, … [Read More...]
Why people resist biblical counsel and how to help them
If you’ve been in ministry for a while, I’m sure you’ve encountered hurting people who resist biblical counsel. They are quick to say something like, “Yeah, I know that, but ...” … [Read More...]
How to help the spouse who stays in a marriage after an affair
Chris cheated on me In early 2002, my husband, Chris, our son, Noah, and I had the opportunity to move to Edmond, OK, so that my husband could join the staff of Life.Church. It … [Read More...]
Helping people who’ve made their suffering worse
In the midst of pain, people are vulnerable and more susceptible to making choices that make their current suffering even worse. The problem is, they don’t realize this. They’re … [Read More...]
When grieving children get lost in their suffering
It’s not unusual for adults who are grieving to make their suffering worse. Many times this happens without their realizing it. They hurt and they want the pain to stop, so … [Read More...]
How to prevent leader burnout
I know how easily a Christian leader drifts in the direction of burnout. By the time I turned thirty-seven, I was dangerously close. Having talked to scores of others over the … [Read More...]
What’s the best way to help someone with anxiety?
Amy can no longer remember a time when her mind was “at rest.” She really thinks she needs to get a job, because there are rumors that her husband’s construction company might have … [Read More...]
How to equip your leaders to care for grieving people
People who are grieving the death of a loved one need enormous levels of support and encouragement. Since grieving people are often emotionally delicate, it’s important that your … [Read More...]
Why leaders must exercise self-control over their emotions
In order for you to help others and serve others well, you need to understand and control your emotions. This will help you stay calm when caring for others and allow you to be a … [Read More...]
Is your church a safe place for people who experience same-sex attraction?
Imagine if you attended a church where your life struggle was never mentioned as an area to receive care, and, if it was mentioned, your struggle was the adversarial portion of a … [Read More...]
Why is my grief lasting so long?
Even with a solid belief system, a person’s grief can be long and intense. Sandy: I am a Christian, and I was surprised that my grief was so long-lasting and strong. I knew … [Read More...]
Grief with a side of guilt: Inside the surprising concerns of the bereaved
When you’re helping grieving Christians, it’s important to remember that they’re doing more than grieving their loved one’s death. They’re also evaluating their response to their … [Read More...]
How young children and teens differ in their grief
Dr. Elias Moitinho gives a quick and helpful overview of the differences between the ways children and teens grieve. Looking for more information on grieving children and … [Read More...]
How children respond to loss and how to help
Most of us like to think of children as lighthearted, happy-go-lucky, without a care in the world. Yet, we know that many children will experience the death of a loved one. When a … [Read More...]
Fightin’ words? How humility may help you avoid your next conflict
Do you have more conflicts than conversions? More disputes than disciples? If so, growing in humility may be what you need to avoid your next potential argument. Susan Lutz … [Read More...]
Safe person: How to respond when people open up to you
Most people like to help others and that is a good thing, because we are surrounded by hurting people every day. They may be in your small group or Bible study, over your backyard … [Read More...]
5 beliefs that make pastoral care more challenging
Sometimes our beliefs about pastoral ministry hinder our effectiveness. As I have interacted with pastors, elders, and deacons—from a wide range of Christian denominations—I have … [Read More...]
Helping those who feel unworthy to take communion
A few weeks ago, a very close friend and I were traveling together. As we discussed a host of subjects, I ventured into more personal territory. I had noticed that he had stopped … [Read More...]
When your “to-dos” are longer than your time: A secret to balancing high-needs members and ministry demands
Every church has a few of them—members or regular attenders who require more of your time and the church’s resources. Maybe it’s: Carol, the single mom who frequently needs … [Read More...]
Living out of a car: Helping the mobile homeless
“I know the hardships of being a working man [on a low income] without drug problems,” shares Tony, “and there’s really no housing situation out there for someone like that. If I … [Read More...]
This isn’t the way it’s supposed to be: Shepherding through tragic, untimely loss
Most churches are well equipped to help families when they experience expected, chronologically correct deaths. When Grandma Jones, age eighty-eight, “goes to be with Jesus,” … [Read More...]
3 mistakes pastors make in counseling
You have a very challenging job. You must develop skills in administration, preaching, teaching, evangelism, leading worship, and discipling people through trials in their lives … [Read More...]
What is CareLeader.org?
“Moses’ father-in-law said to him, ‘What you are doing is not good. You and the people with you will certainly wear yourselves out, for the thing is too heavy for you. You are not … [Read More...]
Painful hindsight: 6 pastoral lessons learned from a sex abuse scandal
I recently learned that a missionary whom I have known and trusted for twenty years has, for his entire adult life, been a sexual predator. He was respected, even revered, both by … [Read More...]
How would you help sluggish Susan?
“It’s been over a year since the divorce; why am I still so wrapped up in it?” Today’s CareLeader Quiz asks you to think through the best way to initially respond to someone … [Read More...]
The flipside: Coaching parents to uncover strength within a child’s weakness
Parents are often frustrated by the behavior of their kids. Dr. Scott Turansky shares a helpful insight that you can pass along to parents to give them hope: Many … [Read More...]
Hijacking member complaints for the glory of God
Lunch was great. But you know what’s next. And it’s not the bill. “Pastor, I’d like to talk to you about something …” From there you hear yet another complaint about the … [Read More...]
Feeling the burn: Defusing the source of your anger
It’s no secret that we get angry with staff members, church members, and even family members. But just because we may have more spiritual authority and insight than those we … [Read More...]
Caught: Key questions to explore in the aftermath of adultery
Trivia question: What were the first two questions posed by God to humanity? If you look into the Genesis account of Adam’s fall into sin, you will see them plainly. Soon after … [Read More...]
Much afraid: Help for the worried in your congregation
Any quick search on Google or Amazon will confirm what we all already know: worry is harmful to our bodies. Here are a few physical symptoms associated with worry: Difficulty … [Read More...]
Loving enough to say no: The necessity of confrontation
Are your leaders reluctant to confront? If your leaders won’t confront those who need to be challenged or corrected, you won’t have a healthy church. Conflict will simmer. People … [Read More...]
First, remember: How looking back can help the grieving move forward
In the end, grief is about how we remember. Memory is powerful. It shapes our lives in many ways. Memory impacts our emotions. Memory shapes the significance we give to current … [Read More...]
The plastic smile: “Pastor, why should I tell someone how much I’m hurting?”
Encouraging people who are hurting or struggling to share their experiences with others in the church is usually good advice. When a person shares, he is often surprised to learn … [Read More...]
Screen-shattered: Helping spouses deal with online affairs
Two years into the marriage, I found out about the pornography, and a couple years after that there was Internet chatting with women.” Although Sarah1 wasn’t tech savvy, she … [Read More...]