Bob and Jane are in their fifties. They’ve been married for over twenty-five years and have college-age children. Lately Jane has begun to wonder if something is going on in Bob’s life. He’s been more evasive, more distant; he doesn’t seem very interested in her. Recently she’s been more eager to connect sexually than he has been, which has not been their history. Jane is … [Read more...]
How to restore broken marriages after an affair, part 2
In part 1 of this case study, Dr. Les Carter outlined how to counsel “Bob and Jane” through the discovery process after Bob’s infidelity was revealed and what signs indicate a couple is ready to begin a restoration process. In this article, Dr. Carter describes typical issues couples must focus on to rebuild a new relationship and how to follow up with a couple when formal … [Read more...]
Magnetic mediocrity: Why women settle for the wrong guy, and what to do about it
When we counsel a couple separating or working through the wreckage of divorce, it’s not unusual for a pastor to think, “If only this could have been dealt with sooner—before it got so bad.” Let’s take it from the beginning. Not the beginning of the marital issues or even the beginning of the marriage. Go all the way back to the moment a couple starts dating, and you … [Read more...]
Screen-shattered: Helping spouses deal with online affairs
Two years into the marriage, I found out about the pornography, and a couple years after that there was Internet chatting with women.” Although Sarah1 wasn’t tech savvy, she decided one evening to try and set up web chatting, since it was something her husband had said he’d wanted. The computer was set with an automatic login using his username and password. After logging … [Read more...]