In my travels over the past twelve years (and fifteen years of campus and pastoral ministry before that), I have had the privilege of talking with countless pastors. Given my obvious interest in pastoral care, I regularly get asked a simple but basic question from people in ministry. It is then followed by an interesting statement: “Should I really try to ‘counsel’ people, or … [Read more...]
8 best practices for your church’s counseling ministry
Should I insist that this counselee attend a local church? How much time should our church invest in a counseling ministry? Should we counsel members of other churches? If your church has a counseling ministry, you’ve likely faced similar questions when counselees and other people attend your church’s care ministries but are not connected to the church body. The … [Read more...]
Conflict resolution: When you only have part of the story
As Proverbs 18:17b says, “The first to speak seems right, until someone comes forward and cross-examines.” Or as my friend Daniel likes to say, “There’s no pancake so thin that it doesn’t have two sides.” For example, you’ve probably counseled: A parent whose teenage son refuses to come in to meet with you A church member who has conflict with out-of-state … [Read more...]
How pastors can help people renew their minds
Pastor Mark found himself becoming frustrated as he talked with Jeremy about what was going on in the young man’s life. Jeremy had recently married Hannah. Jeremy and Hannah dated in college, but seven months into their marriage, Hannah was upset with Jeremy’s behavior. He had become more “inconsiderate” toward her and more “insensitive” to her emotionally. Jeremy: An … [Read more...]
“Pastor, I’m a failure”
My first marriage failed because I was unfaithful to my wife,” shares Michael. “I’m very prone to wanting to go back and beat myself up for that. That was a horrible mistake. I know God is a grace-filled God. He still loves me and has forgiven me, and my first wife has forgiven me. But that’s an area where I struggle. I still think about my failure quite a bit. That’s a vicious … [Read more...]
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