In the midst of pain, people are vulnerable and more susceptible to making choices that make their current suffering even worse. The problem is, they don’t realize this. They’re preoccupied with the immediate pain and finding relief. They are hurting, they react to the hurt, they make choices in an effort to relieve the hurt, and they can get stuck in the cycle of troubling … [Read more...]
When grieving children get lost in their suffering
It’s not unusual for adults who are grieving to make their suffering worse. Many times this happens without their realizing it. They hurt and they want the pain to stop, so they react to the pain and make wrong choices. If adults can get stuck in their grief and troubling their own troubles, can children do the same? They can. This article will help you understand that … [Read more...]
How to care for grieving people
Helping grieving people is risky. Tell someone that you’re sorry he lost his loved one and he may tell you that “People lose keys; I know where my wife is!” Or, your well meaning words can bring a person to tears. Or, a woman’s poise may lead you to think she is doing fine with her grief only to discover—after she’s left the church—that she felt as if no one cared for her. This … [Read more...]
Why is my grief lasting so long?
Even with a solid belief system, a person’s grief can be long and intense. Sandy: I am a Christian, and I was surprised that my grief was so long-lasting and strong. I knew where Mother was, I knew she’d gone to heaven, I knew she was in a better place, and I guess I felt that my faith would get me through. Surprisingly, most of my grief lasted a good two years after … [Read more...]
Grief with a side of guilt: Inside the surprising concerns of the bereaved
When you’re helping grieving Christians, it’s important to remember that they’re doing more than grieving their loved one’s death. They’re also evaluating their response to their loved one’s death. They’re wondering, Am I grieving like a Christian should? Do my feelings of despair indicate a lack of faith? Am I being a bad example to others who look up to me? I believe in what … [Read more...]