When we think about the issue of self-harm, most of us take a step back in confusion. Why would anyone willingly want to inflict pain on themselves? Isn’t that dangerous? What would I do if I encountered someone with that struggle? A few months ago, I shared about why people engage in self-harm behaviors and how to help them stop. In particular, that article touched on … [Read more...]
The roller coaster they never wanted: Helping people trust God when their lives are upside down
If you are a pastor, then I’m sure every once in a while you have a conversation with a Job. You sit down with someone, hear his story, and find it hard to imagine that anything else possibly could be going wrong in his life. It’s natural to feel disheartened by such a story. Certainly, it’s disheartening to live that kind of story. It can feel like nothing is left to be … [Read more...]
Counseling someone considering suicide: Know the myths, risks, and responses
When he comes into your office, his hopelessness is clear. Jon doesn’t see a future for his life. The car accident, the pile of medical bills, and his marriage falling apart weigh heavily on him. He has met with a support group, but the pain seems only to intensify. He is looking for a way out and thinks taking his own life is the only option left. How do you help him? What … [Read more...]
When a person feels trapped but may not want to change, what do you do?
Andy Farmer’s pastoral ministry includes a lot of counseling, so he’s often had someone tell him, “Pastor, I’m trapped in this and I need help.” It led him to write a book about it: Trapped: Getting Free from People, Patterns, and Problems. Recently we talked with Andy about the best ways to respond pastorally. What are some common ways that people get trapped? The … [Read more...]
Why do people cut themselves? And how to help them stop
Self-harm behaviors can be a foreign concept to many of us adults, but they are on the rise among adolescents and young adults. The National Institutes of Health indicate rates anywhere from 7 to 24 percent in teenagers, but as high as 38 percent in college-age women.1 However, these self-harm behaviors are oftentimes misunderstood by those who seek to minister to them. Given … [Read more...]
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