Growing up without a father There’s the seven-year-old boy who spent a couple of weeks with his father, who wants to be a player in Las Vegas. The boy comes back totally confused, talking crazily about women, and saying he wants to be like his daddy. There’s the kid who’s acting out in school. Or the fourth-grader who is participating in a school assignment that … [Read more...]
How I care for everyone—when I can’t be everywhere
The Lord has called me to plant churches, starting with the Bridge Church in Brooklyn, NY, in April of 2014. Part of the mission of Bridge Church is to plant churches all over New York City. We have grown tremendously in the last two years. In care ministry, though, especially as the church grows, I can’t be in all places at all times. Because of this reality, it’s … [Read more...]
The initial marriage counseling session
Where do I start? Ministry requires never-ending learning and growing. I am constantly reminded about something I need to do and develop. Just a few weeks ago, a fellow elder emailed me, asking for guidance for how he and his wife should start their first meeting with a couple who was in marital crisis. My mind raced through my various training lessons and notes. What I … [Read more...]
Premarital counseling
When I’m talking to a pre-marriage couple, they’re giddy, they’re excited, they’re enthused about what’s coming. And I want to be enthused with them, because it is an exciting thing. And one of the things that this tends to do then is encourage them to think they’re better off than what they really are. The excitement, the emotion—all of that—has sort of clouded their ability … [Read more...]
5 common marriage counseling mistakes
Pastors are all familiar with that couple. The couple that asks for help and says something has to change, and now! But why the sudden urgency? Maybe something has come out: there’s been adultery, a secret sin, or an addiction that has been discovered. Or, it may be that what has been irritating for five, ten, or twenty years has reached a tipping point and become unbearable. … [Read more...]
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